Conversations With the Girls…

The topic was weight loss, which as you know, is ever so popular these days… I like to wait for key moments to chime in, and make things awkward; my signature move, which usually results in puzzled looks and a ridiculous smile on my face. Now for the monologue:

Jamie: I have been using Sensa; it’s really amazing, I’ve already lost like 15lbs… I can’t believe all you have to do is sprinkle…

Bridget: Oh really! I have been wanting to try that forever!

Me: You’re a size 1-2, I’m not sure…

Bridget: [interrupting] and how fast did you say you lost the weight?

Me: Bridget…

Bridget: [continues to blather on about how this is a “miracle” in a box] Wow, like wow…

Me: Bridget… [I must be invisible today…]

Jamie: [Very excited and giddy] Cory; hey, what do you do?

Cory: [wait for it; make a strange face, and deliver…] I use this miracle in a box called agym!

Jamie & Bridget: What? [looking at each other bewildered]

Cory: [smirking grin] Oh, you know… it’s where you pick you butt off the couch and run on an elliptical, and lift weights.

Jamie & Bridget: [disgusted face]

8 months ago 1